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Why
by: Tinkerbell

Why can't they see how I suffer inside,
Isn't it clear the secret I hide?
How can you not notice how little I eat,
How when I finish a meal I succumb to defeat.

Watching in anguish what goes down the drain,
It's a way to release all my feelings of pain.
How can what started as a way of control,
Turn into dependence on a white porcelain bowl.

Is it easier to pretend that it doesn't matter,
While the turmoil inside makes my heart shatter.
Do you think if you know that you can't stay my friend,
That nothing you do will help in the end?

Who are these voices that speak of anger and hate,
And if I don't listen what will become of my fate?
They control my mind, my body and soul,
Make me question my place and question my roll.

The voices I hear have become my friends,
They are the words on which I now depend.
I don't hear compliments for they are just words,
The memories of happiness have all become blurred.

Why was I chosen to suffer so hard,
Is it just that I was dealt with the wrong card?
I want to get better and stand a chance,
Will I live to see my own wedding dance?

It doesn't matter how hard that I try,
How fearful I am of the thought I might die.
No matter how much I ignore it, deep down I know,
I really don't want this secret to go.

I need you to love me, to say that you care,
On you I can depend to always be there.
Why was I chosen to suffer like this,
And why can't I see in the end I'll be missed?
Why

©2000 Tinkerbell. Reprinted with Permission.

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