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Articles by Sufferers

All articles that appear here have been submitted and reprinted with the permission of the authors. Copyrights are retained by the original authors and you must contact them for permission to reprint. If you have something you'd like to submit yourself please send it to [email protected]


Today

By: Anonymous

Today, for the first true time I admitted I have a problem. My problem is with the thing inside me that everyday tells me I am no good, makes me feel insecure, unhappy. I feel like I don't know anything anymore. I'm not sure of what I really look like, how good I am at what I do, whether I have a chance. People tell me different things, and I don't know who to believe.

People ask me how long I've been anorexic. I don't know. Sometimes Sometimes I'm not even sure I am! I go to my physciatrist who one week is telling me I'm killing myself, another she says 'you know you haven't actually been anorexic, just showed severe signs'. What does that mean?

There are many sentences I have written and deleted, because saying them would not be me saying them, not the person I am now. That's my illness talking. Bizarre! But there is no point in hiding the truth, especially if you're kidding yourself. The person you can hurt the most is you. Your greatest friend can be you, if you let yourself. You have my permission to disagree with anything i say, but I bet there will be someone out there who feels the same. Or not, but this is helping me. I'm not ashamed to say that.

I don't know why I am like I am. Some days I can answer, because I'm me! All this is going to get me somewhere, teach me something. Even if that thing is how to love myself. I know that. Lots of me is telling me not toaccept that, but by writing it I must be meaning it somehow.

I always say what I mean, even if it's on the spur of the moment, because that's what I mean at that particular moment (!). I find it hard to follow my own advice, so sometimes its better to ignore me when I give advice to others. That's your desision. All I want to say is talk to people.

Don't suffer alone, in silence. You are entitled to tell people how you are feeling. I've found some of my closest friends, who just listen when I need them. I know they are there for me. Sometimes just knowing that helps.


©2001 Anonymous. Reprinted with Permission.

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